welcoming home party
<<2002-06-22 - 8:21 pm>>

i'm back. did you miss me? no, you did not, as evidenced by the absolute overflowing WEALTH OF NOTES you all left. thanks. hahah, no, i kid. i got a cool little hello from someone who's seen the von bondies live and something from roberta (which has come to be expected of course, she's ever the pick me up!). so let's see.

france.

well i would talk about france but to tell you all the total truth france was BORING AS ALL HELL and in retrospect i really didn't like it. too much hassle, way too little fun, whatever. DEFINITELY A SERIOUS LACK OF CUTE BOYS, at least in the towns i visited. so yeah, that's it for that...

i wrote a LOT, at least in my opinion. added a few paragraphs to my VERY, VERY SLOWLY PROGRESSING jeff fic. should have that finished, um, sometime next century or so. yes. about then. i also wrote a muse fic, coincedentally (or not so coincedentally) about muse in france. the way that came about was whenver my stepmom/dad dragged me somewhere i didn't want to go, i just let my mind wander. whenever i got tired or hungry or irritable or upset or bored i would create storylines in my head, or i would imagine dom and matt running rampant throughout montmartre or chris and jonny and will causing havoc in an upscale paris hotel. it worked quite well actually.

i had alot of things to say before, and some of them were kind of important but i don't know.

david, please come back, i desperately need to speak to you... arf... you always do this to me... you make me all vulnerable and weird... your words have a funny power over me that not too many other people have. i'm surrounded by ho-dog susan who is stupid and has a new boyfriend (is ANYONE SURPRISED? because i am not), and... weirdness. god. today has been SO WEIRD.

i have decided i do NOT like emotions. and that is my profound thought of the day.

with that i am going to go alleviate my adolescent angst at the coldplay messageboard.

tom mcrae is still good but i also got the faultline album with chris martin on it and that is also quite worthy.

yeah. trivial things are easiest to deal with.

points of the day:

boys are smelly

boyfriends are stupid

emotions are stupid

chris martin is good

but unfortunately i am way too out of it today to post a chris pic. undoubtedly, as is my nature, i will recover within the hour. or at least after i tell david exactly what i need to tell him, and if i'm lucky i might be able to do that over the phone if my stupidity and clumsiness doesn't get in the way. when has it not?

kill my boot: do you enjoy my thinly veiled attempts at scathing sarcasm?
kill my boot: that comment above was edited, since i thought perhaps my scathing sarcasm might scathe those involved
Kalypso Markiev: i might enjoy them less if they actually hurt
Kalypso Markiev: but hey
kill my boot: yeah
kill my boot: well, i'd tell you exactly what i really thought of you and all of your boyfriends
kill my boot: but that would just be a waste of time
Kalypso Markiev: you've voiced that before
Kalypso Markiev: so
kill my boot: ah, yes. since i've been given ample opportunities in the past to do so
Kalypso Markiev: mmmmmmmmmk. i'm gonna leave you to wallow in your bitterness.
kill my boot: good idea... too bad eli's not here to help you!
Kalypso Markiev: i'm sick and tired of licking my wounds because of other people's insults.
kill my boot: excuse me. you do this to yourself.
kill my boot: punctuation added for dramatic effect.
Kalypso Markiev: as in, i feel hurt by caustic remarks, and that's not human?
Kalypso Markiev: hokay, ice queen
Kalypso Markiev: laters
Kalypso Markiev: hope you had fun in france.
Kalypso Markiev signed off at 9:23:21 PM.

that's it... that's got to be it. there HAS to be a last straw. there HAS to be a point where i suddenly realize all the BULL i have been taking from here for the last three years is such a waste of my life and my tears and my pain. GOD... why are some people such a waste of space? if only ANYONE knew my history with her. i feel so bad, so sorry, for her... she really is pathetic. she's repulsive and sad. there needs to be an ending point. i want this to be the point at which i break. i need to break to teach myself that she is a waste and a horrible person.

i guess that's my welcoming home party.